As a parent, it is important to know how, when and where to tell your child off. Here are some helpful hints:

  • Don’t go over the top and go all out to make them cry. That’s just mean. They will remember it when they grow up.
  • Keep to the point. Children have a very short attention span.
  • Don’t go on about starving children in Africa to a 2 year old. They don’t know where Africa is (unless you live there), and the concept is just a little bit too bizarre for them to comprehend.
  • Always try to be fair. Children invariably see inequality when one child appears to get something (no matter how deserved) when they don’t.
  • Don’t forget why you were telling your child off. They have the attention span of a goldfish and if you can’t remember why you were shouting, how can they be expected to remember.
  • Last, and most important of all: Never, ever, ever, even if you feel that you really must, never ever laugh. It’s not big, it’s not funny, and your child will not know why you are laughing.